Short Santa jokes-In the Class

Santa :- Mam , May I go to washroom ..............

Teacher:- Nahi pehle A to Z sunao , phir jaana ..........

Santa :- ABCDEFGHIJKLMN__QRS_UVWX_Z ...............

Teacher:- P,O,T,Y, Kaha gayi .............

Santa:- Ji wo to meri nikar me nikal gayi .

Short Santa jokes-Just now

Santa is drunk and falls from the first floor…..
People gathered around and asked him.. What happened?
He said…….I don’t know, I also came down just now……..

Short Santa jokes-Lottery

Santa wins 20 cr from a Rs. 20 lottery ticket. The Dealer gives him 11 cr after deducting taxes.

Angry Santa: "Give me 20 cr or else return my 20 Rs back.!"

Short Santa jokes-Bad things

Santa and girlfriend are showering together…
Girl: Do bad things to me…..
Santa puts soap in her eyes…

Sardar jokes-Plane crash

Flash news: A 2 seater plane crashed in a graveyard in Punjab.
Local sardars have so far found 375 bodies and are still digging for more..

Short Santa jokes in Hindi-Dilemma

Santa finds neighbor on top of his wife. He picks up his hockey stock, bur he is confused.... Kya karu?

Sir pe maru to murder…

Aur, gaand pe maru to andar….

Santa Banta joke-To the moon

NASA sent new astronauts Santa and Banta to moon in their rocket.

But they returned from half way there. On inquiry they said, “It is dark moon day, there won't be any moon today in space."

Santa and banta jokes in Hindi-Petrol khatam

Santa: Sir ji, petrol khatam ho gaya , gaadi aage nahi ja sakti.
Banta: Chalo Phir, wapis le chalo.

Short Santa jokes in Hindi-Ghar pe koi nahi

Girlfriend romantic mood me: Aaj ghar koi nahi hai…aa jao..

Santa: Tu mere ghar aaja pagli, mere ghar sab log hai, tera mann laga rahega…

Short Santa jokes-Sona

Daku Mangal Singh Santa Ke Ghar Mein Ghus Ayaa..
Daku : Sona kahan hai, Jaldi Bataao..!
Santa : Pura Ghar Khali Hai Malko, Jithe Marzi So Jao!

Short Santa jokes-Yamraj

Santa went to hell and asked Yamraj,”Can I make call to my wife at home?”

After the call he asked how much to pay?

Yamraj: Nothing. Hell to hell is free.

Santa Banta joke-Pleasant surprise

Santa came from USA and was expecting wife to greet him at home who was not there.

So he asked his son,” Hey Ballu, where is your Mom.”

Ballu said, “Mom ran away with Banta uncle.”

Santa got mad and Yelled, “You idiot, how come you did not inform me when I talked to you so many times over phone.”

Ballu explained, “Daddy, I thought you would like it, so I gave you a pleasant surprise.”

Santa Banta sms in Hindi-Share market

Santa : Share market ne bhi kya din dikhaya hai.

Banta : Kyon?

Santa: Savera hote hee - secretary, girl friend, dhoban, kamvali, sab ek hi sawal puchti hai - aaj to upar chadega na ?

Santa and Banta jokes in Hindi-Balance

Santa apne friend Banta ke saath ATM gaya.

Santa : Banta, zara mera balance check kar do, mujhe check karna nahi aata.

Banta ne Santa ko dhakka de diya, aur Santa gir gaya.

Banta : Tumhara balance kharab hai!!

Santa Banta sms jokes-Fat lady

Santa:. What do you call a fat lady waiting for a bus?

Banta: Moti-vating..!!!

Short Santa jokes-Chori

Wife: Koi insaan chori kare toh usko pachtava ek na ek din jarur hota hai. Aapne kisi din chori ki hai?

Santa: 7 Saal pehle tumhara dil churaya tha abhi bhi pachta raha hoon.

Short Santa joke in Hindi-Galat sangat

Preeto: Raat ko aap peeke gutter mein gir gaye the.

Santa: Kya bataoon, sub galat sangati ka asar hai, hum 4 dost... 1 bottle, aur woh teeno kambhakt peeten nahin.

Short Santa jokes-Kismat

An old Indian women slips on ice an falls.

She cries.. "Hai meri kismat"..

Santa walks past and says.. "Hi Merry Christmas to u too."

Sardar jokes-Santa'a pyjama

An Indian political leader went to his constituency to deliver election speeches for his election campaign. He covered three villages by giving three speeches, with the help of his party worker, Santa.

The leader went to first village and stayed there with Santa for the night, at his house. Santa showing his courtesy, gave a new Pyjama to leader before retiring for the day, expecting to get his pyjama back but remained worried.

Next day, Santa introduced the leader to villagers :-
"Dear friends, our leader is a very hard worker, keeping your welfare in mind, would surely prove to be beneficial to all in the village. Please vote for our leader."
Santa added further, softly :
"The Pyjama, dear friends, worn by the leader is MINE. "

The leader after the speech, more surprised than angered, asked Santa:
"What non-sense was that ? Why did you have to tell the STORY about the Pyjama ?"

Santa apologised....................but was worried about HIS Pyjama not given to leader as gift.

Next day, during second introductory speech about the leader, Santa, in another village gathering, introduced the leader:

"Dear friends, Our leader!" little nodding towards the leader, Santa continued, "is honest, sincere and self made person. You people have seen his achievements in this village in past five years that were remarkable and noteworthy." Santa, scared but intended to get his Pyjama back from the selfish, creepy and shameless leader, added further:
"The Pyjama, dear villagers, (while looking at the Pyjama worn by the leader)worn by our respected leader ALSO BELONGS to our beloved leader."

The leader, Red faced, anger uncontrollable, Yelled at the worker:
"ARE YOU IN SENSES?"

Santa apologized profusely.

On the third and last day of election campaign, Santa, worried about his pyjama worn by the leader, without a hope of receiving it back, introduced his leader in the third and last village:

"Dear friends, our respected leader as you all know, worked very hard for this village and our leader hopes to have your favour during imminent elections"

Santa takes the last heartfelt shot, DECLARES loudly:
"I am not worried about my Pyjama worn by our respected leader."

Short Santa jokes-Surprise

Nurse: Congrats Santa ji, aap papa ban gaye.

Santa: Meri wife ko nahi bolna mein use surprise dunga!

Short Santa jokes-Helmet

Santa Helmet pehen ke bahar nikla toh Police ne kaha: Nikaal Rs 50.

Santa: Lekin maine Helmet pehni toh hai.

Police: Abe, par Scooter kahan Hai?

Santa Banta joke-Condom of Shailesh

Santa: Sweetheart I have two tickets of inglis movie, wanna come?
Banta: which movie?
Santa: "Condom of Shailesh"
Banta: You idiot it's "QUANTUM OF SOLACE"..

Santa Banta joke-Faithful husband

Santa - I am an unfaithful husband : i think of another woman when I sleep with my wife.

Banta - I am a fathful husband : I think of my own wife when I sleep with another woman.

Santa and Banta jokes in Hindi-Apsara

Santa aur Banta salon ke baad mile
Pata chala dono ki shadi ho gayi hai.
Santa: Kaisi hai tumhari BV?
Banta: Swarg ki apsara hai or teri?
Santa: Meri to abhi Zinda hai.

Santa Banta sms jokes-Wife in well

Banta: “My wife fell down in our water well, must be badly hurt and she was screaming a lot.”

Santa: ”Oh what a mishap, but how is she now?”

Banta, “ I guess she must be fine, I don't hear any scream from the well any more.”

Santa joke in Hindi-Gunaahon ki Saza

Santa: Tumse Shaadi Karke Mujhe Ek Bahut Faayada Hua. Mera Agla Janam Sudhar Gaya.

Wife: Kaisa Faayada?

Santa: Mujhe Mere Gunaahon ki Saza Jeete-Jee Hi Mil Gayee.

Santa Banta joke in Hindi-Suicide

Santa goes to a library and asks for a Book on suicide...

Banta, who is the Librarian, ask,

"Oh bhai....Wapis kaun karega?"

Santa Banta jokes-College education

Santa asked Banta, who returned to his village after getting a degree in College
"Hey, how much you are educated?"

Banta, beating his chest proudly replied, "B.A."

Santa rebuffed, "So you studied only two letters and that too wrongly in reverse order! Go back and start cleaning cows."

Santa Banta joke-Banana

Santa: How much is this Banana for?
Banta, the vendor: “Oh $1.00 per pound."
Santa: “Would you sell it for 0.60 cents?"
Banta: “for 60 cents, you would not get even peels of banana."
Santa: “Here 40 cents, do not give me banana peels just the banana inside."

Short Santa joke-Kab Tak Bajaana Hai?

Shaadi Ki Party Me DJ Ne Puchha: Kab Tak Bajaana Hai?

Santa: 8-10 Peg Tak Baja Lo, Uske Baad Toh Yeh Sab Generator Ki Awaz Par Bhi Naach Lenge.

Santa Banta sms in Hindi-Khushi ka raaz

Banta: Yaar tere ghar se hamesha hasne ki awaaz aati hai. Khushi ka raaz kya hai?

Santa: Biwi mujhe jute marti hai.. Lag jaye to woh hansti hai.. na lage to main!