Wisdom

Santa’s wife: “I am going for shopping. I need five thousand rupees.”

Santa: “More than money, you need some wisdom.”

Santa’s wife: “How can I ask for something you don’t have?”

Responsible

Santa’s girlfriend’s father: “I will give my daughter’s hand to a responsible person, are you?”

Santa: “Sure, whenever there is any mishap in our house, everybody holds me responsible.”

No more

Santa Singh was standing in the balcony of his thirteenth floor flat enjoying the breeze and life in general. Out of blue he received a call: “Santa, your wife is no more.”

Shocked and out of his mind with grief Santa jumped from the balcony.

On his way down he realized he was not married.

Only me

Santa’s girlfriend: “Honey, do you really love me? I mean, love only me?”
 
Santa: “Yes darling, I have gone through my entire list.”

Lie detector

A Frenchman, a German and an Indian Sardarji were to be put upon a lie detector to test the machine’s efficiency. 

The Frenchman said, "I assure you I can have half a bottle of neat whisky at a go.” The detector remained silent. 

The German began: "I assure you I can consume a whole bottle of neat whisky in one sitting.” The machine sounded Grrrrrrrr. 

Now it was our Sardarji’s turn:. "I assure…….” Grrrrrrr, off went the detector.