Short Santa jokes-Post

Postman: I have to come 5 miles to deliver you this packet.
Santa: Why did u come so far? Instead u could have posted it....

Santa Banta jokes-Exchanging Berth

Santa: I haven'tnt slept all night in the train.
Banta: Why?
Santa: I got an upper berth.
Banta: Why did'nt you try to exchange your berth with someone?
Santa: Oye, there was nobody to exchange in the lower berth..

Short Santa jokes-Do you drink?

Do you drink? Girl’s father asked Santa.

Santa says “ first tell me whether it’s a question or an invitation?

Santa Banta jokes-Writing slowly

Santa was writing something very slowly.
Banta asked: "Why are you writing so slowly?"
Santa: "I'm writing to my 6 yr old son, he can't read very fast."

Short Santa jokes-Divide

When Santa & his wife filed an application for divorce, the Judge asked: "How will you divide, you have 3 children?"

Pat came Santa's reply: "Ok! We'll apply NEXT YEAR."

Santa jokes-Complimentary

Santa walks into a bar, sits down and orders a beer. As he sips the beer he hears a soothing voice say “nice tie”. He looks around and is baffled to see that there is no one there except him and the bartender at the other end of the room.

A few sips later the voice says “beautiful shirt”.

Santa panics and calls the bartender over and says “I must be losing my mind, I can hear these voices say nice things but there is no one else except you and me”.

The bartender points to the table and says “oh it’s the peanuts , they are complimentary'.

Sardar jokes-Watch a film

19 Sardars went to watch a film.

On being questioned about the big group, they replied that the film was only for above 18...

Santa sms joke-Savings account

Santa went to a bank to open a Savings A/C. After seeing form, he went to Delhi. Guess why?

The FORM said "FILL UP IN CAPITAL ".

Banta jokes-Remedy for cross eyed bull

Banta has a cross-eyed bull that keeps bumping into things. He calls up to vet to try to remedy the problem.

The vet says, "I think the best thing is to stick a pipe up his ass and blow real hard and the bulls' eyes will straighten out."

The vet - a 70 year old man - inserts the pipe and blows. The bulls' eyes begin to straighten, but the vet soon looses his breath and the bulls' eyes are crossed again. The vet gives it another try, but looses his breath again.

The vet looks at Banta and says, "You look like a strong man, why don't you give it a try."

Banta agrees. He then takes the pipe out of the bulls' ass, turns it around, and sticks it back in. He then begins to blow.

"Shit!!!" says the vet. "What in the hell did you do that for?"

Banta replies, "You don't think I am going to put my mouth on the same end of the pipe that you had your on."

Santa jokes-For the House

Santa was not home at his usual hour, and his wife, Preeto, was fuming, as the clock ticked later and later. Finally, about 3:00 AM she heard a noise at the front door, and as she stood at the top of the stairs, there was Santa, drunk as a skunk, trying to navigate the stairs.

"Do you realize what time it is?" she asked.

He answered, "Don't get excited. I'm late because I bought something for the house."

Immediately her attitude changed, and as she ran down the stairs to meet him halfway, she asked, "What did you buy for the house, dear?"

Santa's answer was, "A round of drinks!"

Santa Banta jokes in Hindi-Study of natives

Santa and Banta fly to the south sea islands to study the natives. They go to two adjacent islands and set to work. A few months later Santa takes a boat over to the other island to see how Banta is doing. When he gets there, he finds Banta standing among a group of natives.

"Greetings! How is it going?" says Santa.

"Wonderful!" says Banta, "I have discovered an important fact about the local language! Watch!"

He points at a palm tree and says, "What is that?"

The natives, in unison, say, "Umbalo-gong!"

He then points at a rock and says, "And that?"

The natives again intone, "Umbalo-gong!"

"You see!", says the beaming Banta, "They use the SAME word for 'rock' and for 'palm tree'!"

"That is truly amazing!" says the astonished Santa, "On the other island, the same word means 'index finger'!"

Short Santa jokes-Mother tongue

Pappu while filling up a form: What should I write against mother tongue?

Santa: Very long...

Short Santa jokes-Who killed Gandhi

Santa went for an interview for the post of a detective.
Interviewer : Who killed Gandhi?
Santa : Thank you sir for giving me the job, I will start investigating.......

Short Santa joke in Hindi-Language blues

A Tamilian call up sardar and asks " tamil therima??"

Santa got mad, angrily replied.... "Hindi tera baap!!!"

Short Santa jokes in Hindi-Hum Teeno

Premika ke ghar ke bahar kafi der tak sexy baatein karne ke baad, Santa finally bola..
Darling after all, hum "Teeno" kab tak aise khade rahenge??

Sardar jokes-STD call to Punjab

Sardar wanted to make a STD call to Punjab,
He wanted to save money so what did he do?

Simple, he went to Punjab and made a local call..

Santa Banta jokes in Hindi-Drinking and driving

Santa: Drinking n driving dono saath saath nahee ho sakte.

Banta: Y?

Santa: Jo speed breaker aa gaya, to peg chalak jayega!

Santa Banta jokes-Fine

Banta asked Santa -What is a Fine?

Santa - A Fine is a tax for doing wrong

Banta asked again - And what is Tax?

Santa - A Tax is a fine for doing Right!!

Santa Banta jokes in Hindi-Free in Dubai

Santa: Dubai mein sab kuch free hai,
Taxi,
Hotel
Khana
Pina,
Yahan tak ki Sex bhi

Banta: Wow, tu kab gaya tha?

Santa: Mai nahi yaar, meri wife gayee thi...

Santa Banta sms jokes-Won in race

Santa: Nice watch!
Banta: Thanks, I won it in a race.
Santa: How many runners?
Banta: Just three. A policeman, the owner of the watch and me!

Santa Banta jokes-Divorce on first night

Santa: I divorced my wife on the very first night.

Banta: Why, so?

Santa: I saw the label on her panties, "Tested OK by Phagwara Group."

Short Santa jokes-Side effect

Santa was very happy after taking Viagra.
He said : All the medicines have side effect - only Viagra has FRONT effect

Santa joke in Hindi-Lipstick

Wife : Ye aap ki shirt per lipstick ka nishan kahan se aaya?

Santa : Mein khud pareshaan hoon nishan dekh kar. Maine tu uss waqt shirt utaari hui thi.

Short Santa jokes-Dissection class

Santa is in a dissection class of cockroach. He cuts its 1 leg, and says, "walk", it walks.
He cuts 2nd and 3rd legs and said, "walk" , it walks.
He cuts all the legs and said, "walk....." Finally he wrote the conclusion........
"after all the legs of a cockroach are cut - it becomes deaf......"

Santa Banta jokes in Hindi-Bada laptop

Banta: tujhe apna laptop bada karwana hai..?

Santa: Haan yaar..

Banta: to fir Isme se Window nikalwa ke darvaja fit karva Le..