Short Santa singh jokes - Plants

Santa singh to servant: Go and water the plants.

Servant: It's raining.

Santa Singh: So what take an umbrella and go !!!

Short Santa joke in Hindi-Geeta pe haath

Lawyer to Santa: 'Gita pe haath rakhkar kaho ke...... '

Santa:'Yeh kya, Sita pe haath lagaya, toh court mein bulaya. Ab fir Gita pe haath!!'

Short Santa joke-Figure like Coke

Santa: Darling, years ago u had a figure like Coke bottle.

Jeeto: Yes darling I still do, only difference is earlier it was 300ml Now it's 2 ltr.

Santa joke in Hindi-Surprise

Santa'a Son : "Mummy mummy... Mujhe aik bhai chahiye!"

Mummy, "Tumhare papa abhi Dubai gaye hue hain.. Woh waapis aayain phir sochenge!"

Santa's son : "Kyun na aap papa ko surprise hi de do?"

Short Santa jokes-Same color

Santa's wife goes to superstore, sees mens underwear on sale. She buys a dozen of the same color. Goes home and gives them to hubby.

Santa protests, "Why buy me the same color? People will think I do not change underwear!!"

Wife asks, ”Which people?"

Santa bnata jokes - Affair

Santa, “Why not add some intrigue to your life and have an affair?"

Banta, “But what if my wife finds out?”

Santa, “Heck, this is a new age we live in. Go ahead and just tell her about it.”

Banta goes home to his wife and says, “Preeto, I think an affair will help bring us closer together.”

Preeto, “Forget it, I’ve already tried that. It didn’t work.”

Santa banta hindi jokes - Wife

Banta: Wife agar husband ko naukar samje to husband ko kya karna chahiye?

Santa: Zyada kuch nahi, do char ghar aur pakad lene chahiye

Santa Banta SMS jokes - Bomb

Santa and Banta were fixing a bomb in a car.

Santa : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.

Banta : Don't worry, I have one more

Sardar jokes-One year older

Santa Banta jokes-SWOT book

SWOT BOOK filled by Santa.
1.Strength:My wife,Jeeto.
2.Weakness:Banta's wife, Preeto.
3.Oppurtunity: When Banta is on tour.
4.Threat: When I am on tour

Short Santa joke in Hindi-TV ke alava

Santa Police se: Kal raat chor mere ghar se TV ke alava sab samaan Le gaye.

Police: TV kyon nahi legaya??

Santa:TV to me dekh raha tha is liye..

Sardar jokes-In School

How do you recognize a Sardar in School?

He is the one who erases the notes from the book when the teacher erases the board.

Short Santa jokes-MS Office

Santa attending an interview in Software Company.

Manager : Do U know MS Office?

Santa : If U give me the address I will go there sir.

Sardar SMS jokes - Boss

Sardar sent SMS to his BOSS: “Me sick, no work”

Boss SMS back: “When I am sick I kiss my wife try it”

2 hours later sardar sms 2 boss: “Me ok, ur wife very sweet”

Sardar Jokes - Book

A sardar walked up to the front desk of the library and said, "I

borrowed a book last week, but it was the most boring I've ever read.

There was no story whatsoever, and there were far too many characters!"

The librarian replied, "Oh, you must be the person who took our phone book."

Short Santa jokes-Children after 35

Question : "Should Women have Children after 35?"

Santa : Replied : "No!

35 Children are More than Enough!!"

Santa singh jokes - Credit Card

Waiter gives bill to Santa:

Santa: Take this card.

Waiter: But sir, This is voter card.

Santa: So what? You have written there ALL CARDS ACCEPTED.

Santa jokes - Race

In A 1OO Meter Race, It Was Announced

1

2

3

Start.

All Started Running Except Santa.

Coach: Why Are You Still Waiting?

Santa: My No Is 4!

Santa Banta SMS jokes - Nagpanchami

SANTA: DO YOU KNOW ENGLISH ?

BANTA: YES

SANTA: OK! THEN TELL WHAT IS OPPOSITE OF NAAG PANCHAMI?

BANTA: SO SIMPLE YAAR ......... NAAG DO NOT PUNCH ME.

Santa Banta SMS Jokes - Coin

Santa went to temple & saw people putting coin in box & praying

Santa: Wow! How amazing. People are talking to God through coin phone without receiver

Santa Banta jokes-Dead bird

One day Santa was walking down the beach with some friends when he suddenly shouted
'Look at that dead bird!'

Banta looked up at the sky and said...'where?'

Santa's musings in Hindi-Love accident

Naa ye CHEMISTRY hoti, na me STUDENT hota Na wo LAB hoti, na wo LOVE ACCIDENT hota

Tabhi PRACTICAL ke waqt nazar aayi ek ladki khubsurat si naak uski TEST TUBE jaisi

Uski baaton me GLUCOSE ki mithas thi ETHYL ALCOHOL si thandi uski saans thi

Andhere me wo RADIUM ki tarah chamakti thi jab aankh mili to REACTION hua, love ka PRODUCTION hua!

Fir to lagne lage uske ghar ke chakkar aise, NUCLEUS ke charo aur ELECTRON jaise

Jis din TEST ka PERFECTION tha us din uske pitaji se hamara INTRODUCTION tha

Mano IGNITION TUBE se SODIUM ke piece nikal pade wo bole hosh me aao, pehchano apni aukat IRON kabhi mil nahi sakta GOLD ke saath!

Is tarah tod diya unhone hamare armano ka BEAKER hum chup hi reh gaye BENJALDEHYDE ka ghoont pikar.

Ab unki yado ke bina hamara kaam chalta nahi hain zindagi ho gayi AB UNSATURATED CARBON ki tarah, bekar ghumte AB hum awaara HYDROGEN ki tarah.

Short Santa jokes-Shame

Judge : Don't you have any shame? It is the 3rd time you are coming to court.

Santa to judge : You are coming to court daily, don't you have shame?

Hindi Santa Banta jokes - Light Bulb

Santa 100 watt bulb par baap ka naam likh raha tha

Banta ne puchha "kya kar rahe ho?"

Santa : Bap ka naam roshan kar raha hoon.

short sardar jokes - Test

In aptitude test... Sardar was asked a question

"River Kaveri is in which state?"

Sardar: liquid state (brilliant answer).

Santa Banta jokes-Oldest animal

Santa : Which is the oldest animal in world?

Banta: ZEBRA

Santa : How?

Banta : Bcoz it is Black & White

Santa Banta SMS - Hindi to English

Santa : I have done English course so now speak in English with me

Banta : Tu pahale mai kahata hu woh English kar ke dikha

Santa : Tell me . I can do it right now.

Banta : "Khushi ke mare uski chhati phool gayi”.

Santa: Due to happiness, his chest became breast.

Santa Banta Joke - Sucide

Santa is trying to commit suicide on the railway tracks and he takes along some wine and chicken with him.

Banta stops him and asks "kyon bhai, ye sab kyon leke baithe ho?" (Why do you take these things with you?).

Santa replies "Saali train late aayi to, kahin bhookh se na mar jaun" (If the stupid train comes late, I will die of hunger!)

Short Santa jokes-Car for wife

Friend : I got a brand new Ford IKON for my wife!

Sardar : Wow!!! That's an unbelievable exchange offer!!!

Santa jokes in Hindi-Insaaniyat

Santa amir aadmi ke ghar mein chori karne gaya. Tijori pe likha tha Tijori ko todne ki jaroorat nahi hai, 452 number press karke sahmne vala lal batan dabao, tijori khul jayegi. Jaise hi batan daba alarm Baja aur police aa gayi.

Jate jate Santa Seth se bola: Aaj mera insaaniyat se vishwas uth gaya hai!

Short Santa joke in Hindi-Inflation

Santa ki Patni : Yeh inflation kya hai?

Santa : Pehle tu 36-24-36 thi, ab 48-38-48 hai. Ab tere paas pehle se sab zyada hai, phir bhi teri value kam hai, yeh hi INFLATION hai!

Sardar jokes-Cracking walnuts

A traveling salesman drove into a small town where a circus was playing.

A sign read: 'Don't Miss the Amazing Sardar.'

The salesman bought a ticket and sat down.

There, under The Big Top, in the center ring, was a table with three walnuts on it. Standing next to it was a middle-aged Sardar.

Suddenly, the Sardar dropped his pants, whipped out his huge male equipment and - crack, crack, crack - smashed all three walnuts with three mighty swings!

The crowd erupted in applause and the Sardar was carried off on their shoulders.

Fifteen years later the salesman visited the same little town, found the same circus and saw the same faded sign that read, 'Don't Miss the Amazing Sardar'

He couldn't believe the old guy was still alive, much less still doing his act!

He bought a ticket.

Again, the center ring was illuminated.

This time, however, instead of walnuts, three coconuts were placed on the table. The Sardar stood before them, and then suddenly dropped his pants and - thud, thud, thud - smashed the coconuts with three swings of his amazing equipment.

The crowd went wild!

Amazed, the salesman requested a meeting with him after the show.

'You're incredible!' he told the Sardar 'but I have to know something. I saw your act 15 years ago and you were using walnuts. Why the switch from walnuts to coconuts?'

'Oye Puttar', said the Sardar. 'Ye to umr ka takaza hai. Ab mai buddha ho gaya hoon'

Salesman is puzzled, says "But Prahji, what has it got to do with age?

Sardar "Oye khotey, my eyesight is bad now. I can't see the walnuts!"

Santa Banta jokes in Hindi-Phone nahee leta

SANTA- Yaar Maine Tujhe Kitni Baar Call Kiya Lekin Tune Phone Nahi Uthaya.

BANTA- Kyon Uthaun,Jo Maine 30 Rs De Ke Gana Lagwaya Hai Use Kya Tera Baap Sunega?

Santa Banta jokes-Sania Mirza

Santa: Main Ne SANIA MIRZA se Phone Par Baat Ki..

Banta: That’s Great Yaar. Uss Ne Kya Kaha..??

Santa: Uss Ne Kaha..Wrong Number.

Santa jokes in Hindi-Dimag paani mein

Santa dimag ko paani mein duba rahaa tha...

Biwi - Kya hua?

Santa - Chalta nahee

Biwi - To paani mein kyon duba rahe ho?

Santa - Dekh rahaa hoon PUNCHER to nahee hai!

Sardar jokes-Paint my Porch

A Sardar, recently arrived in the US, wanting to earn some money, decides to become a 'handy-man' and starts looking for some work in an up market colony nearby.

He goes to the front door of the nearest house and asks the owner, another Indian, if he had any odd jobs for him to do.

"Well, you can paint my porch, how much will you charge?" the owner says.

The Sardar responds, "How about $50?"

The owner says "Fine, there's a can of brown paint and brushes in the garage."

The owner's wife, inside the house, overhearing the conversation asks to her husband, "Does he realize that the porch goes all around the house? That's a whole day's job."

The man replies, "He should; he was standing on it. Do you think he's dumb?"

"No, I don't think so. I guess I'm just influenced by those stupid Sardar e-mail jokes we keep receiving."

A short time later, the Sardar comes to the door and asks for the $50.

"You've finished already?" the husband asks.

"Yes," he replies, "and there was paint left over, so I gave it two coats."

Impressed, the man reaches into his pocket for the money and hands it to him.

"And by the way," the turbaned guy adds, "it's not a Porch, it's a BMW..."

Santa jokes-Happy and Sad

Santa & wife are having dinner together.
Wife: Darling, tell me something that would make me both happy & sad.
Santa : Your nipples are better than your sister's!