Truck driver Santa

Petrol pump se 20 km door ek Army truck ka diesel khatam ho gaya. Truck mein Major baitha tha, aur Santa driver tha.

Santa ne Major ko bataya ke Petrol pump tak dhakka lagaana parega.

Sab neeche utre aur dhakka maarna shuru kiya. Kaafi der baad jab Petrol pump par pahunch gaye, kuch jawan thak ke behosh ho gaye.

Santa ne diesel dalwana shuru kiya, to Major ne kaha ke peechhe jo drum hai uss mein bhi dalwa lo.

Santa: bola: Sir, Woh to full hai. Emergency ke liye rakha hua hai!

Santa Banta sms in Hindi-Salad

Santa aur Banta ek shaadi mein gaye. Jab Khaane ke hall mein enter hue to Salad dekh ke hi bahar aa gaye. Bahar aake ek saath bole, "Kya yaar, abhi to sirf sabzi hi kati hai!"

Santa Banta joke-Rat and Bat

Santa telling a joke to Banta: A rat and a bat had a one night stand. Both of them forgot about it. What would you call it?

Banta : Fails me!

Santa : Rat gayi bat gayi

Santa Banta sms jokes-Avengers sequel

Santa : The Avengers sequel should be dedicated to the police in Hindi movies who always arrive late and pick up the pieces.

Banta : Why?

Santa : They can call it Scavengers.

Short Santa jokes-National fruit

An American asked Santa, "What is the national fruit of your country ?"

Santa replied, "It is mango, but actually, it should be Chut*ya Banana"...

Santa's letter to his Father-in-law

Santa's letter to his Father-in-law

Dear Father-In-Law,

Deeply Regret taking a Car in Dowry,

Plz Take Your Daughter or Car Back.

Can't Afford Both!

Regards

Santa

Santa Banta joke-Viagra in Petrol tank

Santa and Banta are discussing their sex life.

Santa : Put a Viagra pill in your Petrol tank.

Banta : Why?

Santa : At least the petrol indicator will stay up!

Santa's message

Santa's message to the world:

Fida hoon uski chaal pe,
Uske bolne ki taal pe,
Chahe tamacha lagay gaal pe,
lekin
Bol deta hoon sare jahan se..
Nazar mat daalna mere maal pe.

Santa in red light area

Santa went to a red light area and met a pimp lurking near a lamp post. Santa asked about availability of a girl and her rate.

Pimp: “A beautiful girl sir….You will like her….She takes five hundred per hour, I take a hundred and that policeman over there will take 50.”

Santa : “Send that policeman to me….cheap and best.”

Short Santa jokes-Pehlay paise

Sant awas sitting with his wife in a park, when a woman approaches them and says to his wife: "Paise pehlay lay lena, ye kameena bohat dhokey baaz hai…"

Santa Banta sms in Hindi-Shaadi shuda

Santa: Tum office mein Shaadi shuda admiyon ko hi kyon rakhte ho?

Banta: Kyonki unhe beizzati sehne ki aadat hoti hai aur ghar jaane ki jaldi bhi nahi hoti.

Short Santa jokes-Girl in train

Ladki Express train mein Santa se poochti hai: Kya main yahaan baith sakti hoon.

Santa: Zaroor!

Girl: Thank you!

Santa: Most welcome!

Girl: Paani ki bottle paas karenge please?

Santa: Lijiye.

Girl: Bhaiya agla station kaun sa hai?

Santa : Mere baap ne mere dimag me koi GPS fit nahi kiya hai, jaldi seat khali ker mujhe neend aa rahi hai.

Sardar jokes-On their backs

Do you know why Sardars make love on their backs?

They are habituated of screwing up.

Santa's repentant wife

One day Santa returned home from office and found his wife in highly emotional state. The moment she saw Santa, she cried: “I am so sorry dear, really sorry.”

Santa (alarmed): “OK OK. Calm down. Now tell me what’s wrong.”

Wife: “There was this beggar who came here immediately after you left for office. He was hungry and asked for some food. I gave him plenty to eat and he went away blessing me. This afternoon the beggar returned and gifted me a book “How to cook.” And to think you have been eating the same food all these years.”

The Rocket launch

NASA was getting ready to launch a very important space shuttle. The scientists and engineers checked and double checked everything to make sure that things are fine. However, on the day of the launch, something seemed to go wrong. The rocket made all sorts of noise but never took off even an inch from the ground. The engineers were puzzled because they could not figure out the problem.

Finally, Santa Singh offered to help. The NASA scientists were desperate by that time and agreed to do anything.

'Tilt the rocket 45 degrees to the right,' said Santa in a serious voice. The engineers were puzzled but did it anyway.

'Bring it back to vertical position', Santa added. The engineers did as instructed.

'Now start the engines,' said Santa. The rocket took off and flew into space. Everybody thanked and congratulated Santa and asked him how he knew what to do.

He replied, 'It is very simple. This is what we always do with our Bajaj scooters in India.'