Saturday, March 31, 2012

Santa Banta sms in Hindi-Badtameez

Grandfather to Santa: Beta ja paani le aa.

Grandson Santa: Mai nai laa sakta, mai game khel raha hun

2nd Grandson Banta: Rahne do dada ji, ye to hai he BADATMEEZ..... aap khud he ja kay le aao.

Friday, March 30, 2012

Santa Banta joke-Super social networking

Santa: When FaceBook, MySpace and Twitter merge into one super social networking company what will it be called?

Banta: They will call it “My Twit Face.”

Thursday, March 29, 2012

Santa Banta sms jokes-Without sleep

Santa: How can a man go eight days without sleeping?

Banta: By sleeping at night.

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Short Santa jokes-Bivi kho gayee

Santa ki bivi kho gayi thi. Usne pas-wale Ram-mandir mein ja kay dil se prarthana ki - 'Hey Bhagwaan Ram, meri sahayata kijiye, mein bahut hi dukhi hun. Meri bivi ko dhoond dijiye.

Bhagwaan Ram ko bechare para daya aayi, ' Dekho bagal mein Hanuman-ji ka Mandir hai. Wahan ja kar prarthna karo. Meri bivi bhi unhon ne hi dhoond nikali thi !'

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Short Santa jokes-Permanent address

A college Application form asked about 'permanent address'

Santa wrote:
www.facebook.com

Monday, March 26, 2012

Santa Banta joke-Failure

Santa : What is the main reason for failure?

Banta : Exams

Sunday, March 25, 2012

Santa Banta sms jokes-Blackberry

Santa: “How was the girl you saw yesterday?”

Banta: “She is Blackberry.”


Santa: “Blackberry? What does that mean?”


Banta: “She is jet black in color and ‘beheri’ (deaf) in ears.”

Saturday, March 24, 2012

Short Santa jokes-Namak

Santa's wife: Zara kitchen me se namak lana.

Santa: Yahan to namak nahi hai.

Wife: Mujhay pata tha tum ho hi andhe, tumhe nahi milega, is liye mai pehley hi le ayi thi..!!

Friday, March 23, 2012

Short Santa jokes-3 Kids

Santa had 3 kids, He named them NC, MC and ABC.

When asked what they meant, he said:

Natural Curiosity,

Mutual Consent and

Absolute Bl*ody Carelessness

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Short Santa jokes-Shayaraana

Santa shayaraana mood mein:

Dil agar "CPU" hota to aapki sabhi yadon ko "SAVE" Kar sakte..
Dimag me agar "PRINTER" hota to khayallon ka "PRINT OUT" nikal lete..
Dharrkan me agar "PEN DRIVE" hoti to zindagi ka back up lete.... ...
Mann me jo "BLUETOOTH" hota to baton ko transfer kar lete..
Ankhon me jo "WEBCAM"hota to tasvir ko receive kar lete...
Kash Zindagi bhi aik "COMPUTER" hoti to use bhi RESTART kar lete
Kaaash aisa hota?

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Santa Banta joke-Borrow

Santa had once borrowed a bicycle form Banta. As luck would have it, Santa had an accident and the cycle was badly damaged. Banta was upset and insisted on having Santa’s cycle in return. They were good friends so Santa was quite upset with Banta’s demand but Banta said: “If I ever borrow anything from you and break it, you do the same, nothing to feel bad about. It is as it should be.”

A year later, Banta requested Santa to send his wife to help Mrs. Banta because they were having a huge party at their place. While helping Mrs. Banta, Santa’s wife slipped and broke her leg. Santa was informed and the injured lady was taken to the hospital.

Next day Santa went to Banta’s house and said: “You send your wife to my place for a few days.”

Banta: “Why?”

Santa: “You borrowed my wife for help. Now she has broken her leg and hospitalized. Till she returns I will have to do with your wife. It is as it should be.”

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Short Santa jokes-Plain

Santa- Shirt ke liye kapra dikhaao

Salesman - Plain mein dikhaaun?

Santa - Nahin, Helicopter mein dikha. Sardar dekha nahi kee mazak shuru!

Monday, March 19, 2012

Short Santa jokes-Side effects

Santa was studying too hard for his Exams.

He went to a Restaurant and wanted to see the Menu but he forgot what it is called.

He asked the Waiter, "Can you get me the Syllabus please?"

Sunday, March 18, 2012

Santa Banta joke-Great minds

Santa:
Galileo - Great mind
Einstein - Genius mind
Newton - Extraordinary mind
Bill Gates - Brilliant mind

Banta : and you?

Santa: Never mind

Saturday, March 17, 2012

Short Santa jokes-So well

On their first night, both Santa and his wife claimed to be virgin.

Wife : ''Honey, are you sure you are a virgin? If this is your first time, why are you doing so well?

Santa : '' If this is your first time, how you know that I'm doing so well?"

Friday, March 16, 2012

Short Santa jokes-No force

Girlfriend : Promise me ki mujhe kabhi touch, ya kiss ke liye force nahi karoge.

Santa : Behen TU ghar ja. Tere parents chinta kar rahe honge!

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Santa Banta sms jokes-Slow killer

Santa reprimanding Banta, says: You should stop drinking. Do you know that alcohol kills slowly?

Banta : That's all right. Who's in a hurry ?

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Santa Banta joke-Guilt and shame

Santa : What is the difference between Guilt and Shame?

Banta : It's GUILT to sleep with another woman, but it's a SHAME to miss the Opportunity!

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Santa Banta sms jokes-Height of Bravery

Santa : Do you know the Height of Bravery gor Girls?

Banta: What?

Santa : Moving out of house without Make-Up!

Monday, March 12, 2012

Santa Banta joke-Car Model

Santa: “What is the model name of your new car?”

Banta: “Err……it doesn’t come to mind. But yes, it starts with ‘T’.”

Santa: “What a wonder. If it starts with tea, you don’t have to spend money on petrol.”

Sunday, March 11, 2012

Short Santa jokes-Not at home

The phone was ringing constantly. Santa called his wife and asked her to pick up the phone with further instruction: “If the call is for me, I am not home, whoever it is. "

Santa’s wife on phone: “He is still here.”

Santa: “I told you not to say….”

Wife: “It was for me. “

Saturday, March 10, 2012

Santa and Banta jokes in Hindi-Sanskriti

Santa is sitting in a Park behind a tree wid his GF.

Old man Banta: Bete, kya ye hamari Sanskriti hai?

Santa: Nahi, ye bajuwale ghar ki Pallavi hai.

Friday, March 9, 2012

Santa Banta sms in Hindi-Topper

Banta: BILL GATES says I'm Not a University TOPPER, But Today ALL University Toppers are My Employees.

Santa: Bus Bill Ki Yahi LINE Ne Mujhe Class Me Top Karne Se Rok Diya.

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Santa and Banta jokes in Hindi-Aaj ke baba

Santa: Aaj ke BABA: Din me Hari Om, Raat me Cond Om

Banta: Din me Agarbatti, Raat me jabardasti

Santa: Din me puja & aarti, Raat me Divya & Bharti

Banta: Din me Swaha, Raat me Ahaa…!!

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Santa Banta jokes-Names

One Mr. Hoyo from Japan came to India on visit with his pregnant wife. They were moving extensively throughout the country. While on tour, his wife had severe pain in the stomach and had to be hospitalized immediately.

After awhile she gave birth to twins. After deliberations, his Indian friends, Santa and Banta suggested two names for the twins-1st - ‘Jo- Hoyo’ and 2nd-‘So- Hoyo’.

After about an hour or so a third child was born. The child was dark in color compared to the twins. Santa named him: ‘Yo-Ki-Hoyo’.

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Santa Banta joke-Street dogs

Santa: “I want to get something done about my problem.”

Banta: “Why, what happened?”

Santa: “These street dogs, they are always at my front door barking their head off. Wonder what I can do.”

Banta: “Get married.”

Monday, March 5, 2012

Short Santa jokes-Phool wala

Phool wala: Sahab ye phool apni girl friend ke liye lejayen..

Santa: Meri koi girl friend nahi...

Phool wala: Phir apni mengatar ke liye lejayen..

Santa: Meri koi mengatar bhi nahi..

Phool wala: Phir apni biwi ke liye lejayen...

Santa: Meri koi biwi bhi nahi..

Phool wala: Ae duniya ke khush kismat insaan! Meri taraf se yeh phool Muft leja!

Sunday, March 4, 2012

Santa Banta joke-Failed in exam

Santa and Banta, both close friends, failed in their annual exams. This was the third time they failed, were scared and didn’t want to go home.

Santa: “Come on, let us commit suicide.”

Banta: “You out of your mind or what? Damn you, we will have to start from nursery all over again.”

Saturday, March 3, 2012

Sardar jokes-Sabse Bada Khatra

Is saal me duniya ke samne sabse bada khatra,

Jab 12-12-12 tarikh aegi

Aur 12bj k 12min 12sec. Pe Tab,

12-12-12-12-12-12 Hoga.

To lakhon sardaron ko kaun sambhalega???

Friday, March 2, 2012

Short Santa jokes-Samosa aur Kachori

Lady Techer - Bachho, batao Samosa aur kachori me kya fark he?

Santa bola - Madam, Bra pehenogi to Samosa dikhega, nahi pehenogi to kachori.

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Short Santa jokes-Status update

Santa updated his facebook status saying ''Thanks be to GOD, my salary allowances plus bonus has been paid.''

Then he received a notification showing his Landlord likes his status.